1. Can't Get My Motor To Start 2. I Was Wrong 3. Siam 4. Hot River 5. Boo To You Too 6. Do ya? 7. Wervin' 8. I'm A Mineralist

Can't get my motor to start 
Can't get my motor to start 
Can't get my motor to start 
Can't get my motor to start 
Can't you get it to go? 
Is your battery low? 
No, I don't think so 
Try pullin out on the choke 
Try lookin' under the hood 
Try pullin out on the choke 
Try lookin' under the hood 
Lookin under the hood 
Never did any good 
The choke must be broke 
Try beatin' down with your feet 
looks like she's startin' to crank 
Let's take the gasoline out 
Try puttin' beer in the tank 
Bring the beer over here 
'Cause I need it to steer 
Try pullin out all the wires 
Try stuffin' cheese in the cracks 
Try dynamitin' the tank 
Smash all the glass with an ax 
Do you have any grease? 
Pour it over the seats 
What did you do to my car? 
What did you do to my car? 
What did you do to my car? 
What did you do to my car? 
Well we took it apart 
But we can't make it start 
We wanna go for a ride 
Let's push it over the hill 
We wanna go for a ride 
Let's push it over the hill 
Better not gt inside 
'Cause she's startin' to slide 

Well I used to think this talk of spaceships 
Was just so much hype 
I really believed there was nothing out there 
Except the Stars and the Stripes 
I mean the scientists said they found out that 
There was nothing there on Mars 
So as far as I was concerned it was just 
The name of a candy bar 
I'm one of those kind of people 
Who need proof before they believe 
Close Encounters left me cold 
And Star Trek seemed naive 
When it came to UFO's 
I was of the scientific school 
Little green men with pointed heads 
Were for little kids and fools 
But I was wrong 
I was wrong 
I was real wrong 
I was wrong 
All along 
I was so wrong 
The people who believed that stuff 
Were always kind of odd 
I mean you might as well go all the way 
And believe in Jesus and God 
I knew I had the kind of mind 
That wasn't easily satisfied 
And besides I had enough problems on earth 
To keep me occupied 
And then one night I was standing 
Looking at the stars 
And I heard something that sounded like 
A hundred space guitars 
The music was so weird it could have 
been the theme from Jaws 
Then I saw something flying over my head 
I thought it was Santa Claus 
But I was wrong 
I was wrong 
I was real wrong 
I was wrong 
All along 
I was so wrong

Here's another song about a place near Hong Kong 
They got lots of opium and Lapsang Southong 
Siam, Siam 
All the fancy pussycats come from this area 
Also got a lot of animals that scare ya 
Siam, Siam 
Python legs are poached in slimy toad saliva 
After eating that I'm lucky I'm aliva 
I am, yes I am 
Ask the King if you can stay to sample cuisine 
Maybe he will even let you dine with the Queen 
Siam, Siam 
Nicest little place i live in since Budapest 
If you think that I'm in love, you're right, I confess 
I am, I am, yes I am, with Siam 
I am, I am, yes I am, with Siam

Do you long to cavort? 
Here's a new water sport 
That you ought to try 
It's a Fahrenheit dream 
Hot and covered with steam 
You won't be bored 
Do you want to get wet? 
Are you starting to sweat? 
Slip over the side 
Now we're caught in a swell 
Here's where Heaven and Hell 
Start to collide 
It's slippery and slimy 
Reach over here and tie me 
I'm so warm I can hardly move 
Mother never told me 
I'd need someone to hold me 
But where I'm from the rivers are all cold 
It's a fisherman's dream 
Dinner's already steamed 
And ready to eat 
When you feel your resolve 
Is about to dissolve 
Then stop for a treat 
In a river of steam 
Nothing seems too obscene 
So let down your hair 
While you drift through a trough 
Slip your bathing suit off 
And really get clean 
You can do your laundry 
While your thoughts are wandering 
And you watch the passing swimmer's poach 
You don't need no Sterno 
In Dante's Inferno 
It's thermohydriatically controlled 
You can't stay in too long 
'Cause the heat is too strong 
You're starting to slide 
Grab ahold of the rope 
Throw your soap in the boat 
Climb over the side 
We can come back for more 
When we start to get bored 
There's nothing as wild 
As a Hot River swim 
On the volcanic rim

Just when we was startin' to play 
Someone yelled out take 'em away 
Then we heard 'em startin' to boo 
What did you do?  What did you do? 
I reacted intelligently 
Here's my method, try it and see 
When somebody's runnin' you down 
You got to turn it around, turn it around 
So when they boo at me you know what I do? 
I tell 'em boo to you too, boo to you too 
Boo to you too, boo to you too 
I don't take it personally 
When somebody's booin' at me 
Makes no difference if the music is fine 
I never pay it no mind, pay it no mind 
When you're tryin' something that's new 
You'll have people booin' at you 
When we hear 'em startin' to boo 
What do we do?  What do we do? 
Well when they boo at us you know what we do? 
We tell 'em boo to you too, boo to you too 
Boo to you too, boo to you too 
Keep your chin up, play what you feel 
Music's always grand if it's real 
Even if they're cruel to you 
You got to do what you do, do what you do 
When they're ready to tear you apart 
Use your noodle adn try to be smart 
Don't just stand there takin' abuse 
You got to put it to use, put it to use 
You make 'em boo on cue, they say boo 
And you say boo to you too 
Boo to you too, boo to you too 
You make 'em boo on cue, they say boo 
And you say boo to you too 
Boo to you too, boo to you too 
Boo to you too, boo to you too 
Boo to you too, boo to you too

I try 
God knows I try 
It seems very clear to me, that I try 
But it's not clear to you, that I do 
You don't know what I mean, do ya? 
You don't know what I mean 
I mean 
I mean I try 
God knows that I mean to try 
I mean it seems so very clear to me, that I'm trying 
But it's not clear to you, what I'm trying to do 
You don't know what I mean, do ya? 
You don't know what I mean 
You're not trying 
God knows you probably mean to try 
I mean sometimes it even seems clear to me 
I mean sometimes it even seems clear to me that you're trying to try 
Is that clear?  Do you know what I mean, what I'm trying to say 
You don't know what I mean, do ya? 
TYou don't know what I mean 
God knows I try

Wervin', we're Wervin' 
Do you need a doctor? 
Swervin' and curvin' 
Are you pocket trained? 
Do you like to Werve? 
Do you have the nerve? 
Do you need a doctor 
when you start to swerve? 
Are you pocket trained 
Goin' 'round a curve? 
Can you Werve? 
Wervin', we're Wervin' 
Do you save the coupons? 
Swervin' and curvin' 
Can I borrow your suit? 
Can you Werve like a bird 
Or do you find it absurd? 
Did you come prepurd? 
Can I borrow your suit? 
Do you find it unnervin' 
Or pleasantly disturbin' 
Can you Werve? 
Wervin', we're Wervin' 
Do you have your 'chute? 
Swervin' and curvin' 
Does your mother know? 
Do you worry when you Werve? 
Are you scared when you swerve? 
Do you get what you deserve 
When you go around a curve? 
I can see your house 
Have you lost your nerve? 
Can you Werve? 
Werve 
Werve 
Werve 

Here's a shocking revelation for you voyeurs 
Such a heinous deviation, these are no clues 
I'm a Mineralist, I'm a Mineralist 
Just the thought of ironing gives me spasms of lust 
I creep up to old wrecked cars and lick off the rust 
I'm a Mineralist, I'm a Mineralist 
Mother used to try to metal in my affairs 
Keep your nose up off that grindstone, people will stare 
Get the lead out of your pants and change your underwear 
I've been stealing baby bottles since I was born 
I'll go blind from balling bearings, doctors have warned 
I like making out with steel-rimmed glasses more than horned 
Erik Satie gets my rocks off, Cage is a dream 
Phillip Glass is a Mineralist to the extreme 
I like tickling ivories and fingering stones 
When my mercury goes up I play with my bone 
Peole take for granite my perversion is wrong 
I'm not harming anyone by beating my gong 
I'm a Mineralist, I'm a Mineralist 
I'll make love to minerals as long as I can 
And in fifty years I'll be a jaded old man 
I'm a Mineralist, I'm a Mineralist 
I'm a Mineralist, I'm a Mineralist